A New Man December 31, 2008

A have a new man in my life. Don’t worry, George and I are still together and having a wonderful time.

This new addition comes in the furry variety, a four month old brown tabby that I adopted from a shelter on Sunday. And what a handsome, sweet thing he is -except for this morning when he was going for a thread and ended up drawing some blood from my arm. But it’s not his fault, he was just playing, my arm got in the way…and it’s actually only the second scratch I’ve gotten.

I think they forgot to install a muffler on this little guy because he sure can purr loud. My little munchkin loves to cuddle beside my head at night and has discovered he can meow and is taking full advanage of me not understanding what each meow means and has me running to see if he’s alright. Now, if this was a human child, I’d just tell it to shut the hell up but I don’t speak cat, hence why the kitten wins.

I hope all of my two regular readers have a fabulous New Year!

I’ll update you all on my upcoming trip to Spain.

The Much Needed Update December 21, 2008

Seven day work weeks were keeping this non-backpacking backpacker pretty busy these past few months and a new full time job and a new relationship have consumed the remainder of it so I do apologize for not updating as often as I’d like. On the bright side, there’s only about two regular readers so it’s not like I’m depriving a collection of people their dose of me.

Part of this entry was written since my last entry and I’m too lazy to correct the tenses. So I’ll guesstimate when I wrote it.

 

First weekend of November:

Things with Jason didn’t work out quite the way I wanted and I’ll get to the reasons for that in a moment. I’ve kind of been living in this bizarre world the last few weeks, doing things I typically wouldn’t such as dating four guys. That isn’t me but somehow it became me.

The night of my second date with one of the prospects, I stopped by George’s to drop off my stuff. I was planning on crashing on his couch because sleeping in his bed after a date would be weird. He offered me a drink as it was still early and as I was sitting on his couch, he told me he didn’t want me dating other people. That he wanted me for himself. I was so torn. Here I was, I had met a great guy that I had fun with, there were possibilities that Jason and I might rekindle things and George was telling me something that I had wanted to hear. Maybe not in the exact words I wanted to hear them in but he wanted me. He finally told me he wanted me. Not as a full-time girlfriend, the term turns him off but what else do you call a exclusive, monogamous relationship?

I went on my date and I ruined it myself. I didn’t mean to but I did. I returned to George’s place where he and I cuddled and fucked. I woke up the next day feeling loved.

The next week, George and I hung out and I was looking forward to the date George had planned for me. I wore a fantastic outfit, even bought a garter belt and thigh high stockings because I know how much George loves them. We had a fanastic evening of sushi and bars. 

 

Alright, I hadn’t written that much, proof that my life has been kind of hectic. So here’s my best recollection of the past two months or so..

After the date with George was Halloween where I dressed as an awesome 80’s chick a la Flashdance. We had a gathering at George’s place and I, in my typical at home fashion, drank and passed out at 10:30. But I did wake up at 2:30 when everyone got back from the bar and continued the party. Go me!

I didn’t have the heart to cancel my date with Jason as he seemed so excited about it but I decided not to tell George that I was going. I didn’t think he’d understand that I needed time to tell Jason that it wasn’t going to work between us. I don’t know if I’ve mentioned it but Jason is in the military and has debated going overseas since I first started seeing him in early 2005.  Since my return, he had been indicating that he was going to go over and serve late next year. This greatly affected the prospect of us trying again as I could do it the first time not really knowing what I was getting into but a second time knowing what it’s like to be “dating the army” was getting to become out of the question.

As we were waiting for our table, I received a text message from George basically saying “Enjoy your date and thanks for lying”. I tried desparately to rach George but he refused to take my call, only texting me twice to convey how upset he was. So that night over a dinner of venison and steak, I told Jason that it wasn’t going to work and I couldn’t handle doing it all over again. I made my choice and it broke my heart into a million pieces because I hurt two people I cared about and loved. I left the evening early and made my way up to George’s place hoping that I could actually talk to him. To my surprise, he answered the door and talked to me. That move is the only reason why he continued talking to me. Jason, however, refused to speak to me ever again.

George and I try and see eachother around two days a week, made more difficult these past few weeks by hectic schedules and both of us getting sick. But things seem to be going really well. I mean, he’s moody, stubborn and scared and I’m just trying to give him the space he needs so this relationship can work. I’m head over heels and terrified because I finally have what I’ve been wanting for the past year or so.

As for work, I have an awesome new job at a software company making some decent coin but there goes my backpacking for quite awhile. Though on the bright side, I’m heading to Barcelona next month for a nice 8 day trip, not as long as I’m accustomed to but it will have to suffice.

Juggling Men October 18, 2008

Four to be exact.

So how did this backpacker, after arriving home only seven short weeks ago manage to find herself juggling four guys?

I’m waiting for you guys to figure that one out because I really have no clue as to how it exactly happened. But here’s a bit of what went down.

After that date with the guy from the restaurant, I figured “Why not try my hand at dating?”. Having never really done it, I figured twenty three was a good time to start. So I logged onto POF (yes, I’m really on there) and decided to shop around for guys. I found a few that interested me and sent them messages and a few guys messaged me. I began talking to two of them, one claiming to be the male version of myself. He and I haven’t had a date yet (Thursday) so I’m not too sure.

The other guy, Ethan, met me for drinks of Monday. We had a great time and agreed to get together again, for dinner this time (tonight). The thing is, he might be a little too eager to date me. He’s been texting me or calling me everyday which is a dream for most girls, but not this one. I need my space, my time to decompress. I’ve been single for over a year. So we’ll see after tonight.

The there are Jason (the ex) and George. Both have decided that they want to try their hands at dating me (again in one case). Jason took me out last night for dinner (no where too fancy. Just a typical chain restaurant) and then we headed to The Drake (my suggestion) for drinks. It was a good night and I’m still not sure about the whole thing but we have made tentative date plans for the first weekend in November (hey, we’re busy people!).

After an interesting conversation with George last weekend, mainly me telling him that Drunk George and Sober George need to have a pow wow and figure out what the hell George wants, he decided that trying to date me wouldn’t be so horrible after all. So we are going out next Saturday for dinner, I’m wondering how it’s going to turn out.

So with all this dating, I need to find me some date clothes so I can rotate through them with the guys. And those sexy, pointy black heels I missed so much while travelling? They’ve had a ton of mileage put on them and I’m loving it!

All Things Considered October 12, 2008

After glacing through previous entries, it has occured to me that I’ve never really discussed my ex Jason that much. I have my reasons for it but today I’m saying “To hell with it”.

Jason and started dating in March of 2006. He was seventeen and I was twenty. We had met through mutual friends and the internet. It sounds weird I know. We were both members of a forum board and we were regulars there. We both ended up attending a hockey game that was thrown together and that’s how we met. It was an instant attraction and we clicked right off the bat. We became that couple that could always be found together though it was usually due to us having mutual friends. We lived two hours apart by transit and always made an effort to see eachother.

After about two months together, I ended up moving out west for a job. During that time we stayed together, talking as often as we could. We seemed to have a knack for the long distance thing, something that is usually the death of most relationships. Four months into the long distance relationship, I flew home for a visit and brought Jason back with me to see where I was living.

I finally had enough of the isolation of living in the mountains at the six month mark. The pregnancy scare I had after Jason had left got me missnig home, my family and being with him. As quickly as I got home, Jason shipped out east for some of his military training. Another sex weeks apart.

We then spent the next months from December to June being together. A happy couple that loved to go out and have fun. He loved my family and they loved him. His family loved me and I loved them. It was every couples dream. I got a job in the city which led to getting an apartment in the city. I was only twenty minutes from Jason by transit and I thought that if anything it would make our relationship even better. 

Unfortunatley I was wrong. Jason began pulling away. Suddenly, seeing me two days a week became difficult for him. He was decidedly busy with friends and the army. With the summer came more military training and family vacations to the cottage. The time he was home he spent with his friends, who as even he admitted, were a poor influence on him. One of his friends in particular did not like me for whatever reason and made it his mission to tell Jason that I was a controlling bitch because I wanted to see him two days a week.

As summer began to wind down, I was having serious doubts about the relationship. Try as I may, I could not get Jason to realize that we had a problem with our relationship. He refused to take us seriously and it was hurting me. We were constantly fighting and I just didn’t have any fight left in me. I had my house warming coming up and decided to refocus my energies into that.

That’s when the relationship died. The day before the housewarming, my girlfriend called to tell me she was sick and unable to help with the shopping and the food. So I did what anyone would do, I called Jason. I asked him if he would be able to help me with the groceries as I was carless and food for fourty people is a lot to carry. His response was “Why do you always call me when things go wrong?”. I told him not to worry about it and that I would find a way to get the food. Enter George to save the day. I later called Jason to ask what time he would be showing up. He asked me what time the party began, I told him and he said that he’d be there when it started.

He showed up an hour and a half late. Then, even among our friends and people that he knew, he clung to me the entire time. I was playing hostess and being suffocated by someone who has never had a problem in social situations.  Around nine, I asked Jason if he was staying the night, assuming that he was. He informed me that him and his friends had made plans earlier in the week to go to Buffalo and he had forgotten about them. I reminded him that he had known about my party for a month and a half. He told me that he couldn’t cancel on the guys. I didn’t pursue the matter. I was hurt but decided that I wasn’t going to let it ruin my night. An hour later, Jason tells me that he’s heading home. More than hurt, I said goodbye. That was the last straw for me. That party was really important to me and he knew that.

Fast foward to present day. Jason and I are friends. We managed to ride out what most former couples fail at. It was hard for both of us. I still loved him when we ended it and I still do.

Last night I received a text message from Jason. He and I have hung out a few times since my return. Friday night I was in his neighbourhood and had given him a call. He told me to stop by and have a few with him and the guys. I headed over and ended up spending the evening talking to his mom and sisters which was awesome. I missed them.

Jason’s message said “We need to talk, soon.” Fearing the worst I called him to find out what was going on. We then proceeded to have a two hour conversation. He told me that he can’t handle having me as a friend. He told me that he was an idiot, that he took me for granted. He wanted another chance. The time we spent together recently had stirred up a lot of those old emotions for me as well. I had thought about it but didn’t see him wanting to try it again. And after everything with George I thought it might be best to explore new options instead.

I told Jason that the best I could do was give him the same chance I’m giving the strangers I’m going on dates with. We could try an actual date and see what happens from there. Maybe we’ll realize that we had a good run and should leave things as is, that we’re better as friends. Maybe it’ll work itself out and we’ll get back together. Who knows?

I Had A Date October 2, 2008

Yep, you read it correctly. This backpacker had a date.

Monday night I was hanging out with my mom and we decided to grab some dinner at the Keg. We sit down and our server comes round to ask us about our drink choices. After we tell him we need a few minutes and he steps away, my mom says “He’s really cute. Kind of like David Arquette”. I concurred and began the drink debate.

After thinking on it for ten minutes, I finally told our server (who coveniently was named David) to make me the bartenders choice.  The only requirements were no vodka and not too sweet. They came up with a Tom Collins using Tanqueray 10. Oh la la. I then ordered the steak and crab combo (yum). Several times, David decided to sit down beside me to chat to my mom and I, asking us what we were up to that night.

My mom then decided she was going to leave the table as she thought he was flirting with me. She got up to go to the bathroom and because he was busy with other tables, he didn’t stop by. She then decided to go for a smoke. He walked past the table and I kind of laughed. He stopped and asked me if everything was okay. That’s when I delivered the greatest line ever. “My mom seems to think you’re flirting with me and I think you’re just trying to earn your tip. That’s why she keeps leaving the table, so you can come talk to me.” To which he quickly replied “Maybe it’s both. I’ll be right back”. And with that, dinner arrived with my mom shortly after it.

I told her about my wicked awesome line and she was quite proud of me. We munched on our dinner and David stopped by a few times to check on things and check me out. After the meal, my mom decided it was time for another smoke. I abstained because I didn’t want cute server boy to be disgusted by my filthy habit.

He dropped by the table to clear the plates and he asked me what I was doing that night. I told him not too much because I had to work in the morning. He asked me if I wanted to do something. I said yes. And just as he was asking for my number, my mom walked back in. And he still asked, in front of her. We made plans to meet up the road at another restaurant in twenty minutes. I decided to quickly down my drink and sneak off with my mom for a smoke so I had enough time to rid myself of the cigarette smell.

As we were walking to the car, who do I see sitting on the curb but David. Having a smoke. Excited by the commonality, I exclaimed “Oh my god! You smoke!” followed by a brief pause and “Thank god!”. Apparently, he had the same plans as I did with hiding the smoking.

We enjoyed drinks, football and conversation for the next three hours. He’s a chef who needed a break before he ended up hating what he loved to do. He likes football and hockey. We got along pretty well. He bought the drinks and paid for the cab ride to the next bar.

It was a nice thing. To go out, feel attractive and know that I’m still appealing on some level after all this ego bruising.